The Satanic Scholar: The Statue Of Puberty

Shave & Haircut

Shave & Haircut

I am actually looking forward to the gigantic statue of Maratha warrior Shivaji being erected off Mumbai’s coastline. Having been to Bangalore a couple of times, I realize how much stuff written in their language kept reminding me I was in a different territory, and how stuff written in Marathi may act as a deterrent to mischievous immigrants. Isn’t reminding people they’re not at home a polite way of asking them to behave themselves?

The statue of Chhatrapati Shivaji Maharaj will stand tall at 309 feet, but I wish they’d pay this tribute to someone who represents the whole nation, as Shivaji is more Maharashtra-specific. Whatever, as along as there’s no Gandhi. And let’s not cry about money, at least this time we know where 350 crore is being shoved.

Growing old and growing up are two different things that have been confusing people since forever. Puberty gave me facial fuzz, a voice to growl with and unbelievable randiness. Growing old happens to me all the time, but growing up is a real high. Like returning home after a crazy LSD trip and looking at a familiar world through reborn eyes. I lie in bed waiting for sleep to come as I question myself faithlessly what I can do about the bitter taste in my mouth and the seeming unfairness of it all. I have the right to remain silent, of course. Whatever, I should either stop being so vague or give up venting completely.

On a hilarious note – a dear friend voting against the statue urges us to “Think recent history: The sight of Saddam’s statue coming down or the Bamyan Buddhas in Afghanistan. Both were desecrated with utmost contempt…You want that to happen to your Emperor too by some unruly miscreants?”.

I doubt that will happen anytime soon, if it ever happens, that is. And should the worry of something being destroyed stand in the way of it being built?


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8 Responses to “The Satanic Scholar: The Statue Of Puberty”

  1. 1 Saurin Parikh
    September 15, 2009 at 08:48

    There’s only 1 cure for that bitter taste: another LSD trip!


  2. 2 Aditya Mehta
    September 15, 2009 at 08:57

    Or maybe I could brush my teeth!


  3. 3 Roy
    September 17, 2009 at 08:22

    309 feet wow massive gigantic!


  4. 4 Roy
    September 17, 2009 at 08:23

    har har mahadeo…jai bhavani. i wont pay the toll now or else get ready to be mauled by us!


  5. 5 The Devil's Advocate
    September 25, 2009 at 07:00

    What happened to the long hair and beard that you told me that you were planning to grow the last time we met at Independence Rock


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