05
Mar
10

Review: Road, Movie (2010)

By Saurin Parikh

Director: “Dev Benegal”

Actor: “Abhay Deol”

Towards the end of Road, Movie, there is a dialogue that goes something like: “Apni apni zindagi hain, apni apni kismat hain.” It was my kismat that made me go for Road, Movie and it is now my duty to make sure you don’t suffer the way I did.

Without exaggerating even a tad, I can say with utmost conviction that the best thing about Road, Movie is its end. The second, and final, good thing is the cinematography. That’s it; the movie has nothing else to write about. It’s been a half hour since I slugged my way out of the theatre and I’m still numb, and not even comfortably. A big bore, a huge yawn is what Road, Movie is.

Dev Benegal came out of a few years of exile to make this movie; I hope he goes into a lifelong exile now. Nothing at all about the movie can be explained or deciphered. There is no story to speak of, no characters to like or dislike, no direction to applaud, no performances to rave about…. nothing. In fact, the movie is so dumb that it has a Rajasthani banjaran acting more sluttish than an Amsterdam whore, with a fuck and forget fetish that would put the latter to shame. Not one aspect about the story is believable. I can rant off a million questions out here but I don’t care, and I don’t think you should either.

My humble and heartfelt suggestion would be to skip this movie. Don’t go for it now, don’t watch it on DVD and change the channel when it comes on TV.


11 Responses to “Review: Road, Movie (2010)”


  1. March 5, 2010 at 07:15

    Thanks to a supercool guy I don’t need to go for the late night show tonight and can watch it on Sunday instead. Tonight I can indulge in my favourite pastime. No, not masturbation.

    Like

  2. 2 June
    March 5, 2010 at 07:44

    Super Yay! I can’t wait, will prolly go this Sunday, too 😀

    Like

  3. March 5, 2010 at 19:51

    What, no rating? Damn.

    Sunday movie plan cancelled.

    Like

  4. March 6, 2010 at 04:33

    Okay, now that I’ve slept off the numbness, I’ll ask the questions that have put gaping holes in this movie’s story:
    (1) Where did Vishnu (Abhay Deol) come from? He doesn’t look like someone who grew up in Jodhpur. Is an iPod hanging off him enough to show him as a cool dude who can’t sell hair oil with his father? Or was he just directly born at that age?
    (2) What’s Vishnu’s motive behind driving the truck someplace across the country? Hardly seems like an exciting road trip. Does driving a broken-down truck for 6 days mean that he’s escaping from his father’s hair oil business?
    (3) How does an uneducated kid working in a rundown dhaba in rural Rajasthan know about Starbucks?
    (4) The kid walks off into some barren land and finds the one mechanic who can fix this ancient truck… miraculous.
    (5) These guys are driving in the middle of nowhere, finding it hard to survive inside a truck and here’s this banjaran jaywalking, looking fresh as a daisy, so fresh and beautiful that it’s love at first sight for Vishnu. Duh!
    (6) The mechanic is in pursuit of some mela, he stops the truck right in the middle of the Rann of Kutch saying that the mela was at that exact spot. Far-fetched.
    (7) Apparently, there are villagers around the Rann of Kutch who are just waiting for someone to erect a makeshift cinema so that they’ll construct an entire fair around it. Even more far-fetched.
    (8) The banjaran is ultra-modern, she kisses better than a city girl, sleeps with Vishnu, has no regrets and no qualms about letting him go afterwards. (Aditya, it’s bullshit, don’t go running off to Rajasthan).
    (9) A bandit turns over a new leaf just by having some hair oil massaged on his head. That entire sequence is worse and more flummoxing than Tashan and Jhoom Barabar Jhoom combined.

    The movie ends just as abruptly as it began. But no one will complain about that, I’m sure. It’s a welcome end.

    Like

  5. March 6, 2010 at 06:17

    “Aditya, it’s bullshit, don’t go running off to Rajasthan.”

    It happened to me, I swear. Banja-raand.

    Like

  6. March 6, 2010 at 06:34

    People have been reading everywhere that this movie is for a ‘limited’ audience. Now, everyone wants to be part of something ‘limited’, so they’ll say they loved the movie, because it’s supposedly an arthouse film (whatever that means).
    The fact is that you don’t become cool and intellectual by pretending to like a lame movie.

    Like

  7. 8 Sam
    March 6, 2010 at 11:36

    Thanks a Zillion, Bro! I was spared from the ignominy of going through an insipid flick. I was actually excited since it was an Abhay Deol flick as Dev D and Oye Lucky Lucky Oye proved to be a clutter breaking movies. They were refreshing as they breathed a lease of fresh air.

    Being a pro at segregating quality movies from mediocre ones with finesse and precision. I will go by your and Saurin’s words.

    Once again, i appreciate your judgment fellas. Bravo, muchas gracias amigos. /m\ 🙂

    Like

  8. 9 Devdutt
    March 7, 2010 at 06:08

    I have a sneaky feeling about this one. I’ll probably try to sneak in a viewing sometime in the coming week. Apparently, Robert De Niro is putting money on the flick for distribution in the States.

    Like


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s


Member of The Internet Defense League

Follow Mehta Kya Kehta? on WordPress.com

Enter your email address to follow this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email.

Blog Stats

  • 1,126,251 hits

%d bloggers like this: