Win A Bottle Of Scotch

While the whole world wants to either take your money or fuck your girlfriend, here’s something to cheer about: you have the rest of this month to win a bottle of Seagram’s 100 Pipers. That’s right, cheapskates – I’m going to pick one lucky person who leaves comments here in April and give him/her the blended scotch whisky in the first week of May. There’s no catch – there’s no contest – just leave a comment anywhere on this blog. You can say anything you want, even if your opinions are half-assed or completely pointless like your existence. I know the world has been sucking your blood all your life so here’s your chance at getting something back!

41 Responses to “Win A Bottle Of Scotch”

  1. 1 ­
    April 7, 2010 at 03:25

    Oh, the sorrows of larceny and cuckoldry, proclaims he,
    skilfully concealing his sorry site’s dropping hits
    Seductively supplying spirits for free,
    (yet) Sadly unprepared for anon’s witty spit

    Is he a writer, or is he a Piper™?
    courting comments from the reading rodents
    Awaiting his beloved Samar to wax hyper,
    triggering his verbal diarrhoea, to become his soiled diaper.

    So, come one! (He entices,)
    Come all! (as he devises…)
    Here’s some Scotch! (a plan that won’t be botched)
    For my blog needs comments…
    Like the crabs need my crotch!


    • April 7, 2010 at 04:38

      Anonymity kills conviction, you douche!
      I’m sure you’re shit scared of being riddled around in the virtual world and then ridiculed in the real world for taking on someone who can belittle you sorry existence to the point of extinction, and hence the anonymity.
      What are you, some jealous fuck who doesn’t have the brains or the balls to create a blog like this one? Get a life!
      And as far hits and comments are concerned, Mehta Kya Kehta doesn’t need to solicit them in any form or manner. Here’s an example of the kind of discussion that this blog attracts, the kind that is way beyond someone as ordinary as you are: https://mehtakyakehta.wordpress.com/2009/12/09/movie-review-paa/

      Get a life, and get a better name if you’re too ashamed of the one your mama-papa gave you.


      • April 7, 2010 at 04:48

        I bet this guy is some kind of a lowly creature… probably a useless fuck who can’t keep a job and sits around in a rundown cybercafe, spending Rs 20 an hour and jerking off at at porn sites.

        He could never fulfill his poetic aspirations, never had the guts to stand up for himself, never raised his hand in class, can’t speak up to his boss, can’t get even a prostitute to sleep with him (he’s probably a 35-year old virgin), can’t put his seemingly decent education to any better use than anonymously comment on a blog that has no place for the likes of him.

        And now, he’s at the point of never disclosing his identity, he’s in so much shit that he won’t get even the slightest bit of respect from anyone who follows this blog. And he doesn’t really deserve it anyway.

        Aditya, let him comment. And let’s ignore him till he can make himself come out of his shell to tell us who he is.


    • April 8, 2010 at 17:58

      let me try my hand at rhyming..

      hey you anonymous you are putting your useless skills to test,
      you should rather go and suck a pig’s breast!

      why don’t you get a life, a name and come out of the closet,
      aah u r scared we might spray something to eliminate you, you dirty rodent!

      it doesn’t take much to do what you are trying to do here..
      you shud rather start appreciating quality stuff and join along to cheer!

      fvck, get a life!


  2. April 7, 2010 at 05:21

    I thought about it and this is what I realised about this dumbfuck’s life, the reasons behind his anger, which he can vent out only by commenting anonymously on blogs:

    He was born ugly, his father shuddered the first time he saw his baby.
    His parents didn’t show off their newborn, they lost friends because of giving birth to the ugliest baby of all time.
    All through school, he was the butt of all jokes, often made to sit on his butt on the floor because the teachers told him he didn’t deserve a bench seat.
    His parents never attended PTA meetings, his teachers refused to waste any time in his development. Everyone knew it very early, this guy was a loser for life.
    Obviously, he made no friends in school or in college. He barely managed to pass his way through the institutes because the institutions wanted him out of their premises.
    One day in college, he asked a girl out. That day, the poor girl attempted suicide and forever lives in the fear of being seen with ‘that guy’ again.
    Later in college, he went to a brothel and was paid a certain hefty amount to never come back. He hasn’t ever seen a real boob.
    Somehow, he managed to land a job, the drivers’ peon in a big MNC. He still works there but isn’t on their payroll anymore.
    One day, he discovered a cybercafe. The owner allows him to surf, but at the condition that he’ll come in through the back door and not show his face to anyone.
    He’s discovered porn, and also dictionary.com. Within seconds of creating a profile on a matrimony site, it was deleted without a second thought.
    He chanced upon Mehta Kya Kehta and decided that this is where I’ll vent all the pent up anger.
    But alas, the poor bloke found out that his virtual being apes his real being.
    Everyone makes fun of him even here, no one cares about him and he’s the biggest joke doing the rounds out here too.

    I pity this fool.


  3. April 7, 2010 at 13:00

    000h, someone dares to show up well aware that Mehta is in the hospital. Bravo!

    So yeah, there’s some whisky and vodka lying around at home and and I’m off hard drinks.

    Blog gets the usual 200-300 hits whether I post something new or not. 😀

    Even more when people comment anonymously.

    Wish I could sit up and type; the right leg feels completely fucked.


  4. 9 Poonam
    April 8, 2010 at 08:43

    Can I win anything at all? 😀
    See, I write my name too whenever I post.
    I deserve something.


  5. April 8, 2010 at 17:06

    One man stands up for me while I’m not around to retaliate to shit being thrown at me. Thanks, Saurin.


  6. 17 T2
    April 26, 2010 at 20:23

    the bottle better come to me mehta or i am gonna make you gulp devils for the rest of the year !!!!


    • April 27, 2010 at 01:56

      WIN. Learn something, Sanchal Malhar and the rest of you weaklings.

      “Sanchal Malhar” was looking for an “Aditya Mehta” (yet another impostor) in Illinois but the little pussy stumbled upon this awe-inducing blog and faaltu mein took panga with the real Aditya Mehta.

      Then he “dared” the real Aditya Mehta to “award” the prize to him, after accusing the real Aditya Mehta of putting up a contest to get more comments/hits. What made the real Aditya Mehta and a few others laugh is “Sanchal Malhar” goes around daring people to give him things while posting comments as Anonymous or not leaving a name. Ha Ha Ha. FAIL, Sanchal.

      T2, let’s not wait till the first week of May. Let’s go get you that bottle whenever you’re free.


  7. April 27, 2010 at 08:58

    Roses are red
    Violets are blue
    Go fuck yourself and your whiskey
    Buy me food


    • April 27, 2010 at 09:06

      Sure…I’m off alcohol anyway. Let’s go to Urban Tadka or some hardcore Mughlai place soon.


    • April 27, 2010 at 12:52

      Oh wait, I’m supposed to rhyme.

      Malhar’s an asswipe,
      I’m not sure why,
      Let’s find a Muslim restaurant,
      And eat some Mughlai.


      • April 27, 2010 at 13:00

        urban takda ! i have never been there and always seen chicks waiting outside to get in. lets go !!!!!!!!!


      • 26 ­
        April 27, 2010 at 13:19

        man, ive talked so much shit in the last few days, i dont even have anything to say anymore.

        abe o bhosadi ke, bakwaas kaise kar raha. saale lukhkhe, teri maa ki choot mein kaley suar ka sadda hua lund. maa ka doo piya hai to bahar aa, internet pe baith ke koi bhi bakwaas kar sakta hai. tere tatton mein dum hai to bahar aa. kahin raaste mein mil gaya to teri gaand maar dunga maiyo ve! tu chutiya hai, jaanta nahin tu aapne baap se panga le raha hai. papa ko sorry bol, sorry bole chutiye. hospital gaya tha, saale hawas ke beej, randi ki aulaad, tera pura khandan naali ke keedon ki tatti chatega. teri sathon pushthein kutton ki maut marengi.

        beti chod, saale tu chipkili ki choot ke pasine ka keeda hai. khooni darindey tere tatte phootengey. kuttey haramzadey. bol, repeat after me

        mehta chutiya hai, mehta chutiya hai, mehta chutiya hai, mehta chutiya hai, mehta lookha hai, mehta beemari waale kuttey ka moot peeta hai, mehta is duniya ka sabse bada chutiya hai, bol haraamzaade bol, admit it you bastaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaard….

        now paste the above text in notepad and start windows xp narrator…..


  8. April 27, 2010 at 14:14

    Do contributors of your ‘Guest Column’ qualify?


  9. April 27, 2010 at 14:32

    What if I live in a dry state called Gujarat, will you send it through a bootlegger or how will you send it to me?


  10. 34 blacksheep
    April 27, 2010 at 14:36

    i want the bottle.


  11. December 16, 2010 at 11:15

    I’d love to win a bottle of scotch and bring it to my bosses Christmas party. He just LOVES to drink that stuff.


  12. August 7, 2014 at 09:21

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    was once good. I don’t recognize who yyou are but definitely you are going to
    a well-known blogger should you aren’t already.



  13. October 8, 2014 at 01:29

    excellent points altogether, you simply gained a emnlem new reader.
    What may yyou suggest about your post thqt you just made a
    few days iin the past? Anyy sure?


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