Archive for January 21st, 2011


Music Review: Mr. Big – What If… (2011)

They may be known best for To Be With You and Wild World, but are so much more than the band who played these songs as they prove yet again, this time with a new batch of songs. Mr. Big’s 2011 album What If… is an amazing display of their song-writing strength, as opposed to being merely a showcase of their playing skills.

Undertow sets the mood for the album, and American Beauty is just what has been missing for the longest time – good old rock n’ roll. The drums, the bass, the guitars and the vocals… all are at work here, each aware of their role, all distinctly heard. Fantastic rock ballads on this one: Stranger In My Life, All The Way Up. In fact, all the songs on the album are excellent.

Mr. Big has never overwhelmed me with their songs the way they have with their musicianship. What Eric Martin, Paul Gilbert, Billy Sheehan and Pat Torpey always leave me in awe of the dynamics they create together; they have always (and perhaps subconsciously) crafted great songs instead of masturbating their instruments. Don’t mistake this for lack of technical wizardry – What If…, like every other Mr. Big album, has deadly bass lines, terrific solos, apt drumming and perfect singing. Some may think of Eric Martin as a misfit, but I say nothing suits this music better than his singing style.

Here’s a band that can be as or more technical than the death metal bands we know, but happens to be a rock n’ roll band. A great rock n’ roll band that chooses to work on collective power, and not individual strength. What If… is yet another superb album from Mr. Big, and I suggest you give it a listen while I try to get my hands (and ears) on the bonus tracks.

RATING: 4.5/5

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Music Review: Decrepitaph – Beyond The Cursed Tombs

So there is someone making old-school death metal in 2011, and it happens to be a band from Texas. Decrepitaph rely solely on doing things the old way – fat-sounding guitars, attempts at large-sounding riffs, intros from horror movies, hardly any blast beats, full-on growling…

The most interesting thing about Decrepitaph is their former bassist: Daterape. What an impressive name he has! Sure, the other guys (Sinworm and Elektrokutioner) sound alright, but no name has ever thrilled me the way Daterape has. Why didn’t my parents name me that? I’ll google the Sanskrit translation and name my kid that. The first song off Beyond The Cursed Tombs is It Shrieks From Below, which has probably got to do with strange sounds coming from underground, but it could also be  about Daterape making out with a fat bitch.


The other songs are about anti-Christianity (Festered Messiah, Desecrated Divinity), fat sluts who have been getting clingy (Repugnant Manifestations, Catacomb of Ghastly Souls), and what happened when Daterape gate-crashed a party of the aforementioned fat sluts (Haunted Mausoleum, Barbaric Autopsy). It’s enjoyable, no doubt – but it’s like watching a campy horror flick: it doesn’t scare you because you’re all grown up now, but you totally dig the way they’re trying to impress you. I’m just unhappy Daterape is no longer in the band.

“I love your daughter and want to marry her!”

“You seem like a nice guy. What’s your name?”



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January 2011
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