Archive for February, 2011


Game Review: Little Big Planet

By Aritro Roy

Developer – Media Molecule

Publisher – SCEA

Platform – PS 3

Score – 9.5 / 10

This game has no real story, no weapons to speak off, no upgrades in any really meaningful fashion, no real 3d enviroment. But this is still one of the best Playstation franchises you have. Here at MKK, we have no discrimination among games. Super Mario has the same rights as Gears of War. LBP is a game you can play with a 5 year old and the day you decide to come out of the closet about being a GEEK, some guys could even give this game a shot with their chicks. Again, at MKK we do not discriminate against genders, hot women have as much right to commit decide in God of War as the next nerd with glasses. Anyway, LBP’s sheer beauty lies is level design. I pretty much played the story mode of this entire game with 2 other friends. This is a side scroller and you have just camera. A single screen with more than player is a problem every side scroller suffers. Super Mario, LBP, Contra….. you name it. I know a lot of people reading this probably don’t play online much. But, if you do have access on your PS3 with a viable connection, you will probably never be bored with this game. You have like a million user created levels; literally a million. Graphics are beautiful this is a Sony franchise, so they make it look as pretty as possible and animation and physics look good at their worst. LBP 2 has just been released. Now I have Mass Effect 2 on my PS3 wondering about Dead Space 2 or LBP 2 for my next play.


Music Review: Beady Eye – Different Gear, Still Speeding (2011)

Fortunately or otherwise, the only element on Beady Eye’s debut album that sounds like Oasis is the voice. Liam Gallagher is in a completely different space on Different Gear, Still Speeding – even with his love for The Beatles intact. The lyrics are occasionally directed at Noel Gallagher, and the music is often upbeat rock n’ roll with some bluesy guitar licks.

Four Letter Word isn’t the rocker one would expect them to begin with; it’s surprising they chose this to open the album. Then come Millionaire and The Roller, two songs that don’t do much at first, but grow on you with more listens. Beatles And Stones is an unabashed tribute to good old rock n’ roll, and Liam sings, “It’s just a wind up dream, so don’t wake me up/ ’cause I like what I see with my eyes shut”, on Wind Up Dream, which sounds like a filler that can work decently with a live audience. Actually, all the songs here are easy listening that a live audience (Oasis’) would enjoy. The band really jams it up on Bring The Light, and For Anyone is a beautiful, beautiful song – it’d be perfect if it lasted longer. Beady Eye sound in a very comfortable place on Kill For A Dream, The Beatles’ influence showing in the way they go na-na-na. Standing On The Edge Of Noise could have done with being punchier; it feels terrible when a song with great potential is forgotten by your mind immediately after it stops playing. Jamming slow and experimental on Wigwam, Beady Eye start wrapping up Different Gear, Still Speeding with a forgettable Three Ring Circus, the splendid The Beat Goes On, and end the album as how they see fitting with The Morning Son. I really don’t have an opinion on the last one.

None of the songs on this album are instant hits that will put Beady Eye in a higher place than or even on par with Oasis, but maybe Liam Gallagher and the others will have a better chance of achieving that with the next album – as of now they’re loving every bit of their freedom, and it shows.


Farewell, Anant Pai

17th September 1929 – 24th February 2011


The Laxmi Bar Arrests

Three nights ago, a group of young men was picked up by the local police from a bar in Andheri East, Mumbai. The reason given to them for their detainment was that the bar they were drinking at did not have a license to serve alcohol. The youths were released from police custody only the next morning, after people in high places intervened. An account of the night by Arun S Ravi:

Everyone was above the age of 21.
Date – Thursday, 17th February, 2011
People in the bar at the time of arrest – 23
Time of arrest – 11: 15 pm
Type of people at the bar –
A group of boys celebrating their friend Siddharth’s birthday including a non-drinking 21year old whose hand was in a sling because of a cricket injury.
2 casual drinkers.
A boy named Brenden celebrating the fact that he was to fly to Dubai on the 18th , with his friends.
A man named Sarfaraz who doesn’t even drink. Neither does his friend who was with him. Etc.

Ashwin and I went for band practice at Freedom Jam Room and decided to go to LP for food and a couple of drinks post practice. We met Keegan Pereira and Avil D’Souza at the bar and were engaged in conversation till 11pm when a cop truck and 2 cop cars arrived outside the bar. The police barred anyone from leaving the bar and forced people to stay inside while they performed their “rounds.” It is to be noted that the cops have been seen performing these rounds on other occasions as well while we’ve been there and it was all fun and games before, but not so much this time.

Timeline with details-
11:00pm – An empty cop van pulls up outside the bar with some 20 odd cops in another van behind it. There’s a police car with its siren lights on outside, and police officers in it. These officers enter the bar, and exit the bar. They enter again and assault a waiter who tries to make a phone call and yell Hindi curse words at him. People start talking when this happens and a cop yells (at the top of his voice) at all of us telling us to shut up. 2-3 other cops dressed in casuals very rudely ask us for our details without telling us why this is happening to anyone and asking for our cooperation. The details included name, age, religion, phone number, father’s name and full postal address.

The cops, inside the Cooper Hospital premises.

11:30pm – All of us (23) are forced to enter a police van that seats 10. The interiors of the bus are filled with cop uniforms hung on railings near the windows, riot shields, chairs and the whole bus just generally fucking stunk. We still aren’t told why this is happening to us and are asked for our cooperation, but very rudely. The way you would ask murderers to cooperate. People start asking why this is happening but we’re told to wait for 15 minutes and they’ll let us go. They said we would be taken to a hospital for a medical checkup. They didn’t tell us what for. We were brought to Cooper Hospital in Juhu in a police van, paraded around the city like criminals and escorted by other police vans. We had 1 armed guard with an assault rifle and a Kevlar vest in our bus and 2 other cops.

12:00pm – We arrive at the hospital and are escorted by armed policemen to the MI room where the medical checkup was to happen. They called out our names one by one and the following is how the checkup took place –
Doctor – Is there any problem with you?
Person – No.
Doctor – Lift up your shirt…. Ok. Now turn around.
This comprehensive checkup was done for all 23 of us and we were forced back into the police van and were escorted to the Andheri East Police Station.

"Celebrating" their friend's birthday in police custody.

1:00am – Upon arriving at the station, all of us are forced into a room and are locked inside it. The room had railings we could look through and communicate with the pigs. We didn’t have any food or water and then we realized that we still had Siddharth’s birthday cake. All of us sang for his birthday and shared his cake behind bars and got to know each other better. The police officer outside, very rudely, told us to shut up. One of the boys yelled back at him. He got up and had his guards open the door so they could give him “special treatment” in some other room. When they came to take him away, all of us pushed him back into the crowd and didn’t allow the officers to touch him. They withdrew and locked the doors. 2 cops then entered with forms that said ARREST/COURT SURRENDER FORM  (Avil D’Souza stole a copy of this form) and they forced us to fill these forms as “standard procedure.” None of us said we would and they left the room.

1:45am – People start calling their friends and relatives who could get us out of this mess. The 3 star police officer enters and tells us to shut up. When asked why we were brought here and treated like absolute shit, his response was “You were drinking in a bar without a liquor permit.”

The manager of Laxmi Bar.

“Why the fuck aren’t the bar owners in this room then?” asked someone to which we never got a clean response, ever.
A relative of one of the boys happened to be the leader of the Youth Congress in south Mumbai . He tried to talk the cops out of it by asking them how we were supposed to know about liquor permit. He said “I have been to LP for over 30 years and this has never happened before.” But the cops didn’t budge. They didn’t even do a breath analyzer test or any concrete medical test to even have any evidence to put us behind bars. It turned out that the lifting-shirt-up fiasco was the check for signs of assault. They said they would have to have us fill the forms only then they could let us go. They also wanted to use us as an example and have us testify in court that the bar we were at didn’t have a liquor permit to scare all the other bars doing the same thing to apply for one, or shut down. They wanted us, desperately to do this, hence we were forced to fill the forms, even if it meant detaining us without any grounds for arrest. When asked why we were locked up the police officer said “They are not locked up, they are in a room.”

4:00am – Tired, everyone finally agrees to fill the forms because we’ve been confined in this shady room with barely any water, no food, and no permission to go to the toilet. Manoj Vishwakarma has a 1 year old boy and his wife waiting for him at home without any clue about what’s really going on. Everyone else had similar stories and it got to a point where we were desperate to leave. We decided to fill up the forms but not sign them. The 2 constables reappeared with the forms and everyone filled them. We were then loaded back into the police truck to be taken back to Cooper hospital in Juhu for a breath-analyzer test.

DEAD DRUNK: The Wasted Constable

5:30am – We reach Cooper hospital after the forms are filled. Again, we are taken there with an escort. Passersby stare as we go by them and everyone looks at us like we’re some criminals. The same armed guard is in the van with 2 constables. The van was stopped outside cooper hospital. Some 40 police constables were outside the hospital waiting for us. The bus stopped at the drive in and we were asked to remain inside the vehicle. After a few minutes we realized we can’t be treated this way. We asked them nicely if we could stand outside the bus, without running away. Just a request. Then a cop yelled at us and told us to be inside. (All the cops were armed with lathis). All of us yelled back at them and took a stand. Everyone would get out of this vehicle NOW. We decided that if they had to hit us, they could do it, but we weren’t fucking staying inside the bus. All of us rushed out of the bus yelling. Everyone was insulting the police, calling them names. Shouting at them at their face. A very emotional Suhail yelled (in Hindi) “TELL US WHY HAVE YOU DETAINED US YOU FUCKING MOTHERFUCKERS!!!! IT’S BEEN 6 FUCKING HOURS!!!! WHAT THE FUCK HAVE YOU DONE!!! WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH US YOU MOTHERFUCKING PIECES OF FUCKING SHIT!!! WE HAVEN’T EATEN WE HAVEN’T HAD ANYTHING TO DRINK !!! OUR FAMILIES ARE WONDERING WHERE WE ARE!!!! WHAT THE FUCK DO WE TELL THEM!!!!!!!” The cops charged to beat him up but we pushed them away and pulled back Suhail and held him back. He was still yelling. Others started yelling too. Then Ashwin Dutt pointed out a drunk constable standing on the cops side. ALL attention went to him. We pulled him to the forefront and took photographs of him. “WE ARE CITIZENS, YOU ARE PUBLIC SERVANTS AND YOU’RE DRINKING ON THE JOB AND ARRESTING US!!!???” someone yelled. “ALL THE COPS SHOULD BE PUT BEHIND BARS AND WE SHOULD BE LET GO!!!.” The drunk constable tries to sneak away but Avil and Ashwin run after him and grab him by his collar and bring him back.

Senior Inspector Bhalerao

6:15am – We are forced again to do the medical test. But we took a stand and said that the wasted constable should be check first. On insisting, the same 3 star officer said “You don’t need to check him, He’s got a family.” Hearing this everyone broke out into anger, yelling at the police for assuming all of us are street orphans! We finally did and completed the test. All of us were loaded back into the armed van and taken back to the police station at Andheri East.

7:30am – The police call it as a bad joke and let us go after they verify whether or not we’ve filled the “Arrest” forms.

PS – Just found out that the name of the police officer is Sr. Police Inspector Bhalerao.

Arun S Ravi also has videos for further proof.


City Youth Paint A Wall Even As Mumbai Beaches Get Destroyed

Drunk Policemen Dance Outside All-Night Bar In Andheri East

Bars In Mumbai Allow Patrons To Smoke Despite Ban

Mumbai’s Rickshaw And Taxi Problems

Alcohol Prohibition In Gujarat

Auto-Thrash Mumbai

Laxmi Bar Review


Movie Review: 7 Khoon Maaf

Vishal Bhardwaj proves he is as capable of boring you as much as any other filmmaker, even if he does it in more interesting ways. “7 Khoon Maaf” is a twisted movie that moves at a slow pace – something you should be familiar with if you’ve seen his other films crawl through a few hours of your life.

Priyanka Chopra is a psychopath who, the narrator (Vivaan Shah) claims, is seeking true love and happiness. But somehow every man she gets married to turns out to be some kind of a sicko.

Her first husband (Neil Nitin Mukesh, laughable) is a one-legged army fellow who thinks Priyanka will become a responsible wife once they have a child. She throws Neil Nitin Mukesh to a computer-generated panther. At his death ceremony, Priyanka meets her second husband (John Abraham, hilarious) – a wannabe rock star who passes off others’ tunes as his own, wears a blonde wig onstage, dresses and walks exactly like W. Axl Rose. I’d have assassinated the bastard just for that. But Priyanka has other reasons – John Abraham is a drug addict who has just graduated from cocaine to heroin, and is caught red-handed playing chor-police with two groupies. “FBI Agent,” he announces to a groupie with a toy gun from behind a curtain.

Hubby no. 3 is Irfan Khan, shayar by day and sadomasochist at night. After deciding to kill him, Priyanka teases him with a glass of whisky, and the second time she slaps him is when I fell in love with her all over again. He gets buried alive by Priyanka’s cronies (Usha Uthup and another fellow).

So that’s what 7 Khoon Maaf is all about – a hubby getting thrown to snakes, another hubby made to overdose on Viagra, here a hubby, there a hubby, everywhere a hubby-hubby. Old Mac Piggy Chops has a farm, and do I want to lick it.

7 Khoon Maaf suffers from the same problems that plague Vishal Bhardwaj’s other films. He keeps the pace sluggish to make the film seem heavier and takes his time to establish all his ideas, and it makes me want to get the fuck up and walk out. When there are seven people to marry and kill, it could be shown in a way that would make viewers want to watch it again, but who’s going to tell Vishal Bhardwaj that?

7 Khoon Maaf is an ambitious film that buckles under the weight of its story.



Anjaana Anjaani Review

Karva Chauth For Priyanka Chopra

Sexy Priyanka Versus Ugly Kareena




Game Review: Guitar Hero III – Legends of Rock

By Aritro Roy

Guitar Hero III – Legends of Rock

Platform – PS 3

Publisher / Developer – Activision / Neversoft Ent

Score : -999 / 10

Game sucks…… you like music, you like metal, buy a real f&%$##@*g guitar. Video games are an occasional escape from reality and not a damn replacement for it. If you like sports and/or music, do the real thing. Not a f*&^&^%g half-assed imitation of a glorious form of art. This review covers every guitar hero-esque and sport-esque game ever released. Compare masturbation to a real f&%k……

More by Aritro Roy:

Sandman Review

Vanquish Review



Versova Koli Seafood Festival

VERSOVA KOLI SEAFOOD FESTIVAL 2016 / 2017 / 2018 / 2019 / 2020 / 2021 / 2022 / 2023 / 2024 / 2025 / 2026 / 2027

WHEN: (This blog has turned vegan; you’ll have to look for the dates elsewhere.)

WHERE: Ganesh Mandir, Church Road, Versova Koliwada, Andheri West, Mumbai 400 061 TIMING: 6:00 pm to 12:00am.

Facebook Page: Vesave Koli Seafood Festival This is it, folks! The mother of all food festivals gets bigger and more popular every year. The Kolis, who are the fishing community of Maharashtra, organize this 3-day festival to celebrate, and people of all castes and communities throng to this event to have a blast. Going to the Koli Seafood Festivalis like attending a rave – thousands of people having a great time moving to loud music, live performances, alcohol flowing free and megatons of seafood, of course! Lobsters, crabs, shellfish, prawns of all sizes, fish cooked in every way possible, fish eggs (yuck!), shrimp, and other tasty creatures from the sea!

Tiger prawns and KF Draught

There are countless food stalls, all run by Koli families. The women are decked in traditional attire and jewellery – they do the cooking and run the show. The men in the family are meek and obedient – they merely help the ladies do their thing. Talk about being pussy-whipped! Some of the Koli girls are really hot and they sure know how to dress up! By the way, these Kolis have absolutely no regard for government rules – there was alcohol flowing without end on a dry day! While the rest of the state had to go to bed with a parched throat, people who attended the Koli Seafood Festival boozed till early morning, and right under the cops’ noses! Man, Oktoberfest is like a shitty kitty party compared to the Koli Seafood Festival. The best thing about this Koli bash is that you can eat as much seafood as you want without burning a hole in your pocket, and since the food is cooked by the Koli families, it’s as authentic as it gets! Check out these pictures from the last five years. Do these Kolis know how to party or what!

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 Photos by Vinita Daki, Deepak Somwanshi, Dipankar Roy and Aditya Mehta Click here to like “Versova Koli Seafood Festival” Facebook Page MORE EVENTS: Oktoberfest | Mumbai Beer FestivalGlobal Day Of Action | Rolling Stone Metal Awards

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February 2011
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