07
May
11

Film Review: Haunted (2011)

Vikram Bhatt pulls out all stops to enthrall with his latest horror flick


Director: Vikram Bhatt

Writer: Amin Hajee

Cast: Mahaakshay, Tia Bajpai, Arif Zakaria, Achint Kaur

Fuck, this Vikram Bhatt is turning out to be quite a dude! He’s been making horror films for quite some time now and this time he’s come up with a whopper. Haunted has a story that’s pretty interesting and scary scenes that will make your heart rate shoot up. The film does have its flaws and share of clichés, but makes up for it in the second half.

Mahaakshay has 10 days to make sure everything’s okay with a 100-year old mansion his dad is selling off to a client. But nothing’s okay with the mansion. From the first night onwards, Mahaakshay hears screams and has locks breaking and books falling and doors that open and shut on their own. Attempt to capture the goings-on with the help of video cameras prove futile, even as he sees a young girl playing the piano in an isolated section of the house. A chillum-smoking bum shows up every now and then to tell Mahaakshay that it is only he (Mahaakshay/Mimoh) who can unravel the mystery behind the screams and set things alright.

Our hero is a brave lad who always runs towards the screams and other bizarre sounds, always ready to face whatever there is. He finds a letter from book that keeps dropping off the shelf and here’s the flashback scene: The young girl who lives in that house kills her piano teacher because he tries to rape her. The teacher comes back as an evil spirit and kills the servants and rapes the girl every night. Unable to handle this daily violation of her body, the girl hangs herself, but still isn’t free from the evil spirit. It is now her spirit that gets raped by the evil spirit.

Mahaakshay, to help this girl, must feel her pain in order to become one with her, and he goes back eighty years in time to the point at which the unfortunate rape attempt happened. Now that he is in the past, he must change the course of destiny…

The real fun of watching Haunted begins only after the interval, when Mahaakshay befriends the girl. His efforts at thwarting the rape attempt and subsequent murder go in vain, and there the movie takes another direction.

Vikram Bhatt pulls out all stops to enthrall his audience with Haunted. There is Arif Zakaria (the piano teacher, the evil spirit) raping the girl (Tia Bajpai), and Achint Kaur (her nanny) turning into a spooky demon that can fly, move objects at will and climb down trees in the eeriest fashion.

In 1920 (which I thought was a good effort), the ghost is destroyed by a recital of the Hanuman Chalisa, and in Haunted, it is the opening of the door of a dargah (Sufi shrine) that blows the demonic Achint Kaur far away. In both 1920 and Haunted, there is a Christian priest praying, and in both the movies… the priest dies, heh!

A special note to my fellow reviewers: If you can believe there is a ghost in the movie, what is your problem if the ghost is a lusty rapist? You shit-cocks get excited about dull movies like Shor In The City because they happen to be offbeat, but are the first to laugh at every attempt a horror flick makes to scare you? FUCK YOU, YOU PRETENTIOUS MOTHERFUCKERS. I’LL REVIEW YOU SOMEDAY AND THEN YOU’LL LEARN.

Haunted is an ‘offbeat’ horror story written by Amin Hajee and it has been directed very well by Vikram Bhatt. It is a paisa vasool movie that had me covering my eyes, smiling at Mahaakshay’s antics (the cell-phone and dance scene), sitting at the edge of my seat, and raising the horns every now and then. And I didn’t see the 3D version. Win, Vikram Bhatt.

RATING: 3/5

 


31 Responses to “Film Review: Haunted (2011)”


  1. 1 Kirti
    May 7, 2011 at 03:42

    After a long time Vikram Bhatt has made a great entertaining horror………..

    Like

  2. 2 Nikhil Warekar
    May 7, 2011 at 05:02

    Bollywood movie hai boss , Exorcism chutiyagiri yahan kaam nahi karti 😉
    Only Hanuman Chalisa , Allah and next Bollywood attempt mein watch out for Ganpati Bappa 😀

    Like

  3. May 7, 2011 at 09:29

    😀

    Great note to your fellow reviewers. 😀

    “I’LL REVIEW YOU SOMEDAY AND THEN YOU’LL LEARN.”

    Like

  4. 4 aj
    May 9, 2011 at 03:36

    goodddddd movie!!!! vikram bhatt rocks

    Like

    • May 9, 2011 at 08:23

      I know this Vipurva fellow. He used to work at Web18. The difference between him and Rajeev Masand is that Vipurva is not a professional critic.

      And these people trying to make sense of horror movies is like fans of Karan Johar’s films sitting down to watch Cannibal Holocaust.

      Like

    • May 9, 2011 at 08:25

      Oh, his unfunny post is for public viewing but only his friends can comment on it? Heh.

      Like

    • 8 Parth Vader
      May 11, 2011 at 06:56

      This Roy is another idiot for sharing that FB link here. It didn’t occur to him that he could have emailed it to you and instead shared it here for all to see. Talk about dumbness.

      Like

      • 9 Riyaz
        May 11, 2011 at 11:16

        He is quite a character.. have seen some of his comments on facebook. overdramatic chap

        Like

      • May 11, 2011 at 11:29

        Firstly watch your tongue man!
        Dumb is how dumb one talks.

        Secondly Very bad upbringing. you do not talk about ppl like that whom you DO NOT KNOW.
        your mother should’ve taught you some good things in life.

        ***MOST IMPORTANTLY WHAT YOU NEED TO KNOW fyi…Fart Whoever

        The moment I found the FB link, I called Varathora (Aditya – who owns this blog), and then we decided to put it up here and on FB with name tags for all to see. Varathora wanted to smother Parikh. Later we have come to a consensus that Parikh should be spared.
        SO I did not mail him. Now go and suck Einstein.

        Like

        • 12 Riyaz_Batman
          May 11, 2011 at 11:35

          pat came the reply. told ya he’s a dramatic fellow

          Like

        • 13 Parth Vader
          May 11, 2011 at 11:47

          Have you tried watching your tongue while talking?
          Roy Boy, I dont need to know you personally to talk about you.

          Parikh should be spared? OH you gave him a new lease of life? LOFL SHUT UP IMBECILE

          Like

        • 14 Parth Vader
          May 11, 2011 at 12:10

          OH you want to drag my mother into this? BUT BUT i was very busy tending to your mom so i didnt learn anything except how to fuck. Reason why your mind works slow is because you were malnourished as a child because i drank your mother’s milk. sorry for drinking it all that but i was thirsty

          MOST IMPORTANTLY WHAT YOU NEED TO KNOW

          As much as Mehta likes people leaving comments here he would never, and i mean never want people reading that FB post because it is one of the many reviews that have panned the movie so STOP HIDING BEHIND MEHTA and think of a better comeback

          Like

          • May 11, 2011 at 15:17

            Hey, it’s cool! I don’t mind the link being here. It’d have been great if we could’ve commented on that post because Demonos and I would’ve had a blast frying the fuck out of all those people giggling in agreement with it. Anyway, let’s all just chill now.

            Like

            • May 12, 2011 at 05:57

              now who’s being dramatic dude.

              anyway, i feel hoodwinked on such threads. it would had been great if there were more healthy and knowledgeable contributions than this.
              not important for me. i think this blog deserves better threads and not media whores.

              i now know even mehta enjoys longer threads, either ways.
              cheers, keep the blog on.

              Like

              • 17 Parth Vader
                May 12, 2011 at 12:49

                hoodwinked LOFL you mean youre feeling fucked in the ass\

                youre the last person who should talk about healty and knowledgeable contributions. what healthy and knowledgeable contributions have you ever made fuckhead?

                lastly, there are no media whores here except your mommy so forget about changing the topic.

                last but not the last, of ccourse mehta enjoys longer threads moron. who wouldnt want reactions on their website? DONT YOU ENJOY LONGER COMMENT THREADS ON YOUR PSEUDOINTELLECTUAL UPDATES? (yeh i am on your facebook and incidentally found this blog because of a link you shared)

                cheers keep the blog on ROTFLMAO youre giving your kind permission the way you spared the fb post writers life????? GET REAL YOU OVERDRAMATIC QUEER

                Like

  5. 19 yash
    May 9, 2011 at 08:12

    Iyer
    Iyer
    Iyer…

    Like

  6. 23 Shubo
    May 11, 2011 at 12:25

    Tia Bajpai’s rape scenes gave me erections throughout the movie.
    Brutal rape in 3D is WOW.

    Like

  7. 24 neha
    May 16, 2011 at 14:35

    awesome movie… a must watch

    Like


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