19
Dec
13

Beer Review: Trooper Ale (The Iron Maiden Beer)

yeast india company shitcocksShitcocks like the ones you see above are the reason I can’t quit drinking alcohol. If these chodes had half a brain, they’d make the Iron Maiden beer more accessible to the public by sending it to liquor stores that stock imported beer instead of giving it exclusively to four or five select eateries in the city. Am I glad I didn’t attend the Mumbai launch of Trooper or what? As it is I don’t like talking metal with people who know nothing about it, and that event was sure to be crammed with metalheads who don’t understand anything about beer either. Not that one needs to know anything about beer or metal to enjoy them, but it does get my goat when choots who’ve never seen anything beyond the pathetic lagers they guzzle at cockroach bars voice their opinion on an ale, absolutely clueless about the style and what to expect from it. (No, dumbfucks, ale isn’t just an old English word for beer.) And this lot is what the Yeast India Company buffoons make their target group to sell this beer to.

Now that I’m done berating everyone, I can breathe easy and write about Trooper.

trooper ale iron maiden beerThe Iron Maiden beer is just another ale, exactly as I expected it to be. Heavy dark-orange, the drink leaves no lacing. The nose reveals a slightly fruity character which doesn’t extend to the taste, which is basically malty. Ordinary, unexciting and one-dimensional, Trooper is on the traditional side of ales and could be a good starting point for those who want to understand the style. If Bruce Dickinson wanted to give the world just another straightforward bitter, the job has been done, but Trooper is outrageously priced at more than double of what it’s worth. For those who are looking forward to the Iron Maiden beer, this is sure to be an underwhelming experience. Even though I didn’t expect it to be great, Trooper still managed to disappoint me, and I drank another beer immediately after to get rid of the taste.

Up the irons? Not after being let down like this.

RATING: 2.5/5

ALSO READ: Welcoming Trooper – the Iron Maiden beer – to India


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