Posts Tagged ‘pakistan


India and Pakistan Unite for 4-Way Split ‘Imperial Assault Vol. 1’

While that crappy TV show Sur Kshetra is making both the nations compete with each other and while countless mindless cricket fans will be joyful or miserable depending on the outcome of today’s India-Pakistan cricket match, Wartorn Records (Pakistan) has brought the two countries together for a unique 4-way split.

Imperial Assault Vol. 1 features Solar Deity (Satanic Black Metal from India), Marwolaeth (Old-School Death Metal from Pakistan), Purgation (Brutal Death Metal, India) and Myosis (Doom Metal, Pakistan).

Get your shields out to face this relentless attack from India and Pakistan and enjoy the extreme metal bonanza from Wartorn Records!

FREE DOWNLOAD: Bandcamp | Mediafire


Nightmare Come True


It was all testosterone and adrenalin as long-haired, sweaty men spat hours of heavy metal to long-haired, sweaty guys who’d been standing there all evening trying to get a good view of the stage, even as some of them still struggled to make it through the unruly crowd to the front row, so that they could enjoy banging their heads even more. This could be any metal show, but we’re talking about the first one I attended. Independence Rock ’97 at Rang Bhavan. I swore that evening as band after band belted out covers of popular international bands that I’d play on that stage someday.


Rang Bhavan is no longer there, Independence Rock can suck my cock, and metal bands don’t play covers anymore. What’s happening is my death metal band Exhumation is playing at Independence Deathfest ’10 with three other excellent bands. We’ll be sharing the stage with Chronic Phobia, Atmosfear and Gutslit, and it’s going to be an evening of brutal music.

The show’s happening on August 14, which happens to be Pakistan’s Independence Day, but don’t be confused about what we’re celebrating. Also, don’t come to support us or the scene because it’s not a fucking charity foundation; come if you like death metal or are interested in the checking out the bands or just curious about the music. No, we won’t make you sing the National Anthem.


Movie Review: Tere Bin Laden

Tere Bin Laden is a rather silly attempt at stretching a gag and turning it into a movie, but it does make you laugh a little. A Pakistani reporter has his visa rejected several times and, desperate to raise money to procure a fake visa, hatches a plan that goes awry.

The reporter, while covering a cock-crowing competition, finds a man who bears an uncanny resemblance to Osama Bin Laden, and decides to make a fake tape that will get him cash and end his visa woes.

The funniest parts of Tere Bin Laden are the making of two tapes with the Osama lookalike, who happens to be the miserly owner of several hens. The first tape, with Noora in the guise of Osama Bin Laden, sends shivers up and down America’s spine and makes the country go on high alert. The lookalike’s threats make America panic so much that it ends up attacking Afghanistan, while the intelligence agencies are out to get this Osama, dead or alive.

Thanks to fear the tape creates, the reporter’s plans to work in America go for a toss, and he convinces his accomplices to make another tape, one in which Osama Bin Laden extends the olive branch to George Bush.

Piyush Mishra makes his presence felt yet again, this time as the head of the tv channel, and Pradhuman Singh makes you laugh aloud with pretty much everything he does, because he looks exactly like Osama Bin Laden.

Writer-director Abhishek Sharma lets his imagination run wild, incorporating plenty of scenes that you might expect while watching cartoon shows, but eventually it’s Pradhuman Singh providing the laughs.

Don’t go in expecting a rip-roaring comedy; Tere Bin Laden is just about okay.

RATING: 2.5/5


Protected: Crushed Skull On Christian Shoulders

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Protected: Old Bal Is Getting Desperate

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Political Cartoons

Dec 15, 2008

Reading about Ajmal Amir Qasab begging to be allowed to write to his family cracked me up. That he feels like eating meat makes me laugh even harder. And just when you think it cannot get funnier, along comes a bunch of saffron-clad illiterates to threaten defense lawyers against fighting the fellow’s case.

It’s no secret that besides trying to frighten citizens and making a whole lot of noise in their mother tongue, these guys do little else. As has always been their way of going about things.

Which makes me come up with two fun ideas.

Footage of the torture Qasab undergoes should be aired on telecast internationally. Watching him cry and feel like shit would make people feel real good, I think. To see him executed in public would’ve been entertaining, but unfortunately, we are gluttons for punishment. If we stand for bullshit like turning the other cheek, we deserve every slap we get. But we won’t be angry enough till a burkha-clad suicide bomber comes this way and blows some of us up, yeah?

Another awesome thing to do would be to laugh at all these hooligan politicians every time they start to open their mouth. Getting provoked is pointless if there isn’t going to be a retaliation. That our race thrives on stupidity is something I will enlighten you about in another post, maybe next year. So instead of gathering at The Gateway Of India to check out chicks, we should join a billion hands (and other body parts if required) and let these political leaders know they will not be voted into power. We can tell them that even if we don’t mean it, just to see the fun.

Pakistan is making an ass of itself, and that’s a real shame because they’ve always had an strong, aggressive cricket team. Whatever, cricket sucks and more on that later.

We don’t have whatever it takes to laugh in the face of our political cartoons and let them know they’re incredibly stupid, so we end up looking like a bunch of jokers when we criticise another country, no matter what it has done.

Maybe someone should let the Shiv Sena know Ajmal Amir Qasab will not be hanged unless he is tried first. I’d give in writing but unfortunately for them, I don’t know Marathi and they don’t know any better. Buzz off!

Coming soon…Illustrated Weakly

Posted by Aditya Mehta { 3 } Comments
[From my Buzz18 blog ‘Lashkar-E-Shaitan’]

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